Many of us were raised in dysfunctional families. Within those systems, the family tends to enable dysfunctional roles for its members. Children on a subconscious level assume one of four roles to cope with the shame of the family. These roles, unless identified and dealt with, carry over into adulthood and can have serious effects.
What kind of roles to children and adults play as a result of their past family dynamics?
- The Hero: Always feeling like you have to save the day, be the best at everything you try, always feeling the pressure to perform and have it all together. And for the most part, you do (appear) to have it all together. But deep down inside you’re exhausted.
- The Invisible: No matter where you are or who you’re with, you don’t feel like you have the permission to speak up and say what you really think. You feel invisible and you don’t feel like you deserve to be heard. Subsequently you feel and think as though everyone is more important than you are.
- The Clown: You don’t talk about the issues — you just laugh about them. You don’t accept input – you just laugh it off. Your motto in life is to not take anything seriously. But every now and then you feel so confused inside and you’re not sure why.
- The Scapegoat: You feel guilty for the things that happen around you. As a kid, you always got into trouble and you expected to be punished. You live as though you’re always waiting for the other shoe to drop, always waiting for something to happen so that you can be blamed for it. You have a “blame it on you” attitude.
Do you identify with any of these things?
Dr. Self made this video for you, to help you identify which of these habits you have been playing in life, how to understand the root of the reason why you have carried on these habits for so long, and what you can do to finally break free.
This video is so incredibly powerful. Watch and please be sure to share with a friend!
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Is there someone in your life who looks for ways to discourage you, guilt you, and manipulate you? Dr. Self made this popular video (with over 45,000 views on Youtube so far!) with you in mind. Click play to get some insights on how you can rise above the spirit of manipulation and control and be truly free. Don’t forget to share with a friend!
When the Lord makes us a promise, we know in our hearts that’s it’s going to happen. That’s faith: knowing and trusting God for something that we have not yet seen. But there’s more to it than that: the other part of faith that we often miss is that faith has both an aggressive side to it as well.
When we look at the Word of God — even in the Old Testament — we see Him repeatedly making promises to His children. “I’m going to give you this, I’m going to take you there”, and on and on He incessantly spurs them forward by promising them greater and better things than what they were currently seeing in that moment. But when we read a little further ahead (and this is a pattern that we often see), we see Him giving them directions on how to reach that promise. But, wait a minute, God! I thought you just made a promise! What do you mean we now have to go to war? What do you mean we have to go to work? Shouldn’t it just happen?
I’m sure the children of Israel had questions when the Lord would first make them a promise, and then tell them they have to go to work. I mean, shouldn’t it just happen because God says?
Yes. But a promise from the Lord is more than just an announcement of what the Lord is planning to do, it is also an invitation for partnership.
The Lord told the children of Israel that He was delivering the enemy into their hands, and then directed them to go to war. The Lord told Joseph through dreams that He was going to put Him in a place of authority, and then He had to go through a sea of trials that looked opposite of the promise. The Lord told Abraham that he was going to have a son, and then he went on for over a decade without that son that he was expecting. What does God expect during those waiting seasons? Persistence.
This past Sunday at Freedom Fellowship Church, I got a major wakeup call from the Lord in regards to how He expects us to steward His promises. I realized that I have been just passively practicing faith (the quiet knowing in my heart) and not actively practicing faith (the actual doing of what it takes to get to where the Lord is promising) in regards to some of the things the Lord has promised me.
What about you, has God made you any promises that you are believing for? Are you willing to not only believe it in your heart but actually partner with the The Lord’s purpose for your life?
Congratulations to two new ICM graduates – Wilma Cobb and Renay Bullard on their recent graduation at Liberty Church in Arab Alabama. Wilma received her Masters in Ministry and Renay received her Masters in Christian Counseling. Both of these extraordinary women hold a 4.0 grade point averages. They are truly outstanding examples of Christ. We at ICM feel very proud and very blessed to have them as our newest alumni.
As I read the beginning of Genesis, one of the things that stands out is that everything God spoke happened. There was not one thing that He spoke that did not happen. That is worth reading again. There was not one thing that He spoke that did not happen. Not one. Whatever God speaks . .. . will happen. – Dr. Christie Self
For those of you who follow this category or perhaps have joined one of our Hot Topic nights in ICM’s virtual classroom, you may already be familiar with the dangers of yoga. Without taking too much time to repeat what we’ve already taught, yoga is form of worship to the Hindu gods. On the surface, that sounds pretty straight forward, and yet, I still hear believers tell me, “Oh, I don’t believe in it (ie; yoga)…I only do it for the exercise.”
The lie that a Christian can practice yoga apart from its spiritual significance is the grand deception Satan has successfully launched against the church. In fact, this deception is so successful; there are now churches in the Body of Christ that teach Christian yoga which is a contradiction of terms and can’t exist any easier than Christian-Islam.
Recently, God crossed my path with Laurette Willis of PraiseMoves, a fitness ministry with a call to kick yoga out of the churches. Before God called Laurette to the ministry, she was a yoga instructor and as such, is quick to point out that yoga is religion and cannot be practiced solely as a physical exercise. (See the Laurette’s presentation The Truth About Yoga at www.bigmarker.com)
Why is it that believers are so reluctant to see yoga for what it is? There’s something very significant about yoga that Satan tries to keep hidden from believers, but what is it? Knowing that Satan imitates, corrupts, or makes forgeries of everything God creates, I asked God to show me what the evil one was corrupting that made yoga poses so dangerous.
In this case, God was very quick to answer my prayers and nearly told me the answer right on the spot.
When God gives me understanding, He allows me to “see.” This seeing is like hundreds of jigsaw puzzle pieces falling from above and all landing in their correct orientation to suddenly produce a complete picture that I see with complete understanding. It really is quite remarkable.
My yoga pose question was answered in this way – many parts fell seamlessly into place.
Allow me to share with you now, the jigsaw puzzle picture God sent me when I asked Him what it was that Satan counterfeits though yoga poses that keeps believers blinded from the truth.
Yoga poses are a counterfeit of a holy form of worship practiced by heaven’s angels before God the Father, even back when Satan was still Lucifer – the cherub that covers. (See Eze 28:14)
As Lucifer, the covering cherub, Satan was present on God’s holy mountain when the sons of God, or heaven’s angels, came to present themselves before the LORD. The word “present” comes from the Greek word יצב yâtsab and means to offer or is an offering. In context with “present themselves,” heavens angels made themselves an offering to God in worship to Him.
Seeing this, with a heart filled with pride, Lucifer (ie: Satan) declared he would raise his throne above the stars. (See Isa 14:13) Lucifer was saying that instead of covering the mercy seat as the covering cherub, he, himself, would sit upon the mercy seat and be worshiped by the “stars” or heavens angels. Satan desired to be worshiped by the angels, and later by man, by having them present themselves before him just like heaven’s angels presented themselves to God the Father.
God’s word provides us with several references concerning this act of worship called presenting.
We see heavens angels present themselves before the LORD in Job 1:6 and 2:1.
Job 1:6 Now there was a day when the sons of God came to present themselves before the LORD,
Job 2:1 Again there was a day when the sons of God came to present themselves before the LORD
Second Timothy 2:15 instructs us to be diligent and …to present yourself… to God.
2Ti 2:15 Be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth.
When God called Moses to come before Him on Mount Sinai, God said, “present yourself there to Me…”
Exo 34:2 “So be ready by morning, and come up in the morning to Mount Sinai, and present yourself there to Me on the top of the mountain.
Romans 6:12 warns us against presenting or worshiping sin with our bodies.
Rom 6:12 Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its lusts,
Rom 6:13 and do not go on presenting the members of your body to sin as instruments of unrighteousness; but present yourselves to God as those alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God.
Finally, Romans 12:1 summarizes a full understanding of worship by presenting.
Rom 12:1 And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all He has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind He will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship Him. (NLT)
Give your bodies to God as a living and holy sacrifice – this is what presenting means. Presenting is a holy form of worship to the LORD in which the body is offered as a living offering. Satan copied and corrupted this practice so he and his fallen angels would be worshiped in their dark kingdom.
A yoga pose is an offering that presents oneself to the god the pose represents. When one twists one’s body into the cobra pose, one is worshiping the serpent god. When one lays flat on their back for the corpse pose, one is worshiping the god of death.
How can you as a believer in Christ, with an understanding of Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross, worship the god of death that Jesus gave His life to conquer?
God tells us to put no other gods before Him, and yet yoga does just that, through poses that worship a multitude of Hindu gods. Is it any wonder Satan tries to keep this knowledge concealed?
I urge you, do not present your body in worship to false gods through yoga, instead fill your mind on God’s word and present yourself before Him holy and righteous, cleansed by the blood of the Lamb of God.
Do you ever wander from God? I do. How easily I get distracted and start down paths the Lord did not design for me. And then I find my heart caught up in other things. Sometimes the Lord allows calamity to come our way, because it is the only way to get our attention and to help us find our way back to Him. He wants the devotion of our hearts and He deserves it. Lord help us to keep our hearts fully devoted to You. Thank You for Your loving kindness, Your compassion, and mercy. – Dr. Christie Self